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I visited my sister on Monday, and slept over. This time around we watched uhhh, Escaping Twin Flames, I think that's what it's called. It's your regular escaping a cult documentary, except with a twist. AKA, the time when Netflix accidentally made an anti trans documentary lmfao. First of all and keep this in mind going forwards, this is also something mentioned in the documentary itself ironically enough, but you know how cults will always vehemently deny they're a cult? Ok so prepare for the ensuing hilarity. When I tell you how SHOCKED my sister was when we got to the part of where they forced people into transition, and then had a "gender expert" come on screen to tell us, the audience, TO NOT CONFUSE TRASNESS WITH BEING A CULT, because it's sooooo not a cult you guys, it's sooooo much different from this real evil cult you guysssss, there's a difference between exploring your gender identity that exists within a madeup and harmful framework of gender stereotypes and being forced into choosing your gender identity you guys!!! It's so different??? So don't think trasness is a cult??? Here, we will even provide you with a statistic, trans people TOTALLY don't regret their transition you guys, they LOVE being eternal paypigs for the medical system and they TOTALLY don't have a large suicide rate or anything, p-p-p-please you have to believe us we're TOTALLY not a cult!!!! Like holy shit netflix, they REALLY accidentally made it sound like being trans is a cult my jaw was wide open because omg. There was absolutely 0 need to hamfist this, because obviously these women were being transed due to this cults obsession with each couple having a divine feminine and a divine masculine being, and since most cult members were lonely women that believe in spiritual new age woo woo bullshit they had to tell 50% of them they were actually men, to you know, have the cult work. Like I'm very critical of trans shit but this documentary wouldn't be the thing to make think "hmm well this means trasness is a cult in general", but you know what did make me think that? The hilarious damage control lmao. An even sadder part was when mothers of the cult victims (women forced into a transition to find their ~twin flame~ and having to become the ~divine masculine~) on screen had to do their best to ~respect their daughters (now sons) pronouns~ because why??? Political correctness?? Hello??? Are we complying with the abuse a cult performed on your daughters because that's better than misgendering them, even though they were basically forced into transitioning???!?!? AHHHHHHHHH. Ok I'll give them that maybe they're just doing it so the daughters don't get offended and ostracize themselves from their families even further - yeah it's just that haha... Oh another funny part was that the cult was super lgbt friendly in the beginning (despite the divine masculine/feminine which the trans members of the cult were totally into anyway - it was there from the beginning), and their sign to leave was when the cult became a bit more trad or whatever in their viewings of gender roles and when they started saying that homosexuality basically doesn't exist - the most hilarious part was how THIS was their cue to leave, and not when the cult paired a 19 year old GIRL with a 30 something DRUGGIE ALCO WITH NO JOB and forced her TO LIVE WITH HIM and also peddled the "women always have to please their man whenever he wants it despite how they feel". Like really, the lgbt unfriendliness was a bit too much for you, but all of this wasn't? You disgusting fucks lmfao.
I have to say I'm struggling to feel any empathy for a lot of these people. A sister pimping her own younger sister to the aforementioned druggie... Like HOWWWWWWWWWWWWW. GIRL, HOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. People that fall into cults should be forced into a program that teaches them common sense. Because there's no way... They're not even dumb people, that one lady was a damn cancer researcher, a fucking scientist... Holy shit... And she was desperate to reconcile with her pos boyfriend THAT LEFT HER WHEN SHE WAS SICK. AHHHHHHHHHHH?!?!??!?!!?
It's interesting because in the past few years I've been seeing a lot of this twin flame shit being used to excuse abusive boyfriends in the "well we're twin flames, we're made for each other and all the abuse I go through doesn't matter because of that, the connection I feel to him is the strongest connection there ever will be and nobody else will make me feel this way" type of shit, and it's just so. ugh. Women really were sold off on this disney idea of one true love, but it baffles me they let it affect them this much in their adult lives. We're so forced into this idea that only a partner will bring us true happiness that it leads to shit like this. Not that I'm excusing these women entirely, they truly have to be a certain brand of retarded to go into a spiritual mlm. S P I R I T U A L M L M, AS IN THE GAINS YOU MAKE AND THE PRODUCTS YOU SELL AREN'T EVEN TANGIBLE. LMFAO.
Today was my first time ever in a private clinic. My grandpa was getting an MRI for an upcoming surgery, so I went with him and my mom to help him walk. Our whole street is completely dug up because they're re-doing the whole pavement and road so he can't walk down the street alone. It's actually horrible because it worsened his already bad back, since he can't get out of the house, and he can't even drive his car. Anyway, we had to go to a private clinic because wait times for a non-emergency MRI are insanely high. I'm talking June of 2025. Lmao. They had a black friday deal so the MRI cost us 180€. A black friday deal for an MRI sounds incredibly dystopian... Anyway it was interesting to see how much private clinics differ from public hospitals. The reception area looks like the reception area for any random company with offices. It's white, but it doesn't give off a hospital vibe at all. The two receptionists look like hotel receptionists, young women with done up hair and makeup and a big smile on their faces. There's a few TVs in the waiting area and they're all showing commercials for the private clinic. State of the art skin cancer diagnostic equipment, plastic surgery, we give you results on the same day etc. etc. I wonder how much more the doctors get paid there. My grandpa was done in like 20 minutes and we were home in less than an hour after he was done. Missed the rush hour just barely. I just went to check their price list and clicked on the plastic surgery category and got depressed... Apparently there's surgery to "correct" your inverted nipples. The fact that it's called correction means there's something wrong with inverted nipples, which is the most random thing I've ever heard of lmfao. Also there's penis thickening surgery with lipofiling and hymen reconstruction. Ew ew ew ew ew.
Tomorrow I'm getting my piercing resized. My piercer said I need to wait a month, and now it's been a bit over a month. I spent most of the last week just... doing almost nothing so I don't know why I didn't go but it shouldn't be a big deal. My piercing is healing pretty well I think, although last two weeks my bottom lip started to show some changes. Every few days I get a bit of like skin I need to take off with saline around the top part of the piercing. I'm not sure whether that's just from the piercing, or a combo of really cold weather that makes my lips really dry and me not using any lip products at all yet. I'm a pretty bad lip biter from time to time too, but I've been pretty good with abstaining from it now. Anyway there's no pain, redness or swelling so I think everythings cool. The lower part of the piercing is still a biiiit red right around the hole, but it's no different from how my nostril was. I think that will disappear as I get it resized and it stops moving around so much. The urge to play with the piercing is so STRONG.
I'll also be meeting up with my sister tomorrow, yay. She'll go with me to the piercing place and maybe pick out new jewelry for her septum. We went thrifting a week ago and I found a burgundy American Apparel tennis skirt for 1€. Yeah I'm thinking 2015 is back. I probably won't even wear it (it's a biiiiit wide around my waist and I just dont wear tennis skirts lmao) but I'll be saving it for some tumblr costume party. I wonder how the brand even found itself here, we never had American Apparel in this part of Europe. Probably from Germany or something.
I went to the book fair yesterday!! Since I went with my mom and sister after work, we got there pretty late, around 6pm. And the bookfair closed down at 8pm!!! 8??? We were shocked, because I SWEAR it used to close down at 9pm. But actually, I just went to check for last year and indeed during weekdays it closes at 8pm. I guess we just never came so late, and because sun sets so early this time of year all of my memories of the bookfair are set during the night. We ate dinner there too, usually you have those overpriced food stalls with like 9€ hamburgers or whatever so we go for hot dogs instead. But this year we found a food stall that sells kielbasa with a lot of garlic, don't think there's a name for it in english since it's strictly a local thing. Holy shit, the sausage was actually huge and so, so tasty. I love this specific type of sausage and usually I'm not a huge sausage fan. I drank so much water afterwards though lmao. This is the first year they sold a ton of manga at the book fair, but the "discounts" were nonexistent. Hell, I saw a manga with a usual selling price of 14$, now being sold for 13€ WHICH IS THE EXACT SAME PRICE AFTER CONVERSION??? lmao??? I remember when I was a kid, the usual discounts you'd see were like 30-40%. Now the only books with those discounts are like self help books, cookbooks and weird religious stuff. Even used book shops were pretty expensive. I had a lot of fun listing through 70's magazines and we managed to find some archive style book of families in my town so we searched up a ton of people. It cost more than 20€ so we didn't buy it... It seems there were some used book shops with decent prices, but we didn't manage to browse through their inventory since the fair closed. Maybe on Sunday we'll come by again, since we're going to the nearby cinema.
Yesterday was All Saint's Day (I wrote this on the 2nd I'm too lazy to correct now lmfao), which means graveyard visits. We already made a few trips earlier in the week to set up the flowers, yesterday we just took a ton of candles and lit them up on everyones graves. The older you get, the more work awaits you on All Saint's Day... Fun fact, my great grandparents grave is probably the only grave I've seen that got damaged during the war by some random shrapnel. Almost looks like a bad omen... or maybe you could interpret it as luck as well! The graveyard in my town is expanding so much it's kind of crazy. We managed to find a few graves from our distant-ish family that we had a hard time finding in the past (these people died about a decade ago), since the "new" part of the graveyard isn't marked yet. I think this was one of the only visits in which I haven't bumped into a ton of people I know. Kind of strange.
Today I went to get my glasses, I believe I spoke about this the last time I got my glasses as well. I get them across the border because they're much, much cheaper. We got some great food for lunch, I took a few photos on my slr and I hope they'll turn out fine... It's my first time shooting with this cheap black and white film so I have 0 idea of what I'm doing. Film is always a fun surprise... Recently I organized my photos from this summer, and from spring as well. It was really nice to see all of them in an album.
Ok day later after the above paragraphs, on the real today, I went to the hospital with my grandpa, mom and uncle because my grandpa had a doctor consultation scheduled for his future surgery. He has such a hard time walking, and the hospital we went to is HUUUUUGE. Probably the biggest hospital I've ever been to. It was so hard to walk around with him, next time we'll ask for a wheelchair. At first we were directed to a completely wrong place, then most of the elevators were broken so we struggled with that, then when I found the real place we needed to go to I went down by stairs for 7 long floors lmfao. And after all that trouble... his primary care physician sent him there before scheduling an MRI that he needs in order for the consultation to take place. Wasted gas, and effort. And for what? We struggle so much with his doctor, we need to find a different one because this isn't the first time something like that happened. My mom is furiously e-mailing his doctor right this very moment probably... My uncles hospital visit went fine at least. Not everything was so horrible though, we went and got french fries and sprats (my grandpa loves them, and so do I) for a pretty cheap price at a market close to my sisters house. It was raining so hard we had to eat them in the car though. The car will smell like fish for the foreseeable future probably... It was fun though ngl, we listened to the news on the radio and munched away while waiting for the rain to stop. We even lucked out with finding a parking spot in a place that's always full! It's the little things...