February 2021

Yesterday was such a great day. It was nice and sunny, and I think the trend will continue for the rest of the week. I went to take a long walk with my mom after staying in my house for like a week straight. Didn't see that many people outside in a while, cafes are half open - as in they're not letting people inside but they're still giving coffee to go so people are hanging out and stuff. Can't believe almost a year passed since the start of corona and the first lockdown. While taking a walk we found a phone on the ground, luckily the kid that lost it was searching for it on his bike so he got it back fast because we spotted him. And on our way back home we found almost 30€ in cash so lucky us. I didn't find money on the ground for a long long while. Sucks for the person that lost it though, I didn't see any lost money posts on facebook groups yet. I'm finally relaxing a bit, classes will start next week I believe.

What a rough exam season. I had 11 courses, so far I knocked off 9 and I'll have to leave one behind for the extra round in April. I'm still addicted to a doll site and I need to chill out. Arguing with teens is not that productive. I'm going back to messing around with this site, I have some ideas and I'd love to revamp everything but I just feel too tired for anything, I'm so exhausted. And physically I'm not doing shit! It's driving me crazy.

One funny thing, with all the online arguments I've come to dislike americans (no offense to all the americans reading this). I might elaborate on this some other time. Also a lot of the arguments got me thinking about things I didn't think about much before. Like for example I see the mantra "sex work is valid if it's ethical, all sex workers are valid, valid, VALID!!". And a weird realization hit me. I don't think commodification of sex will ever be ethical in its purest sense... Of course sex workers are not the ones to blame for this. I just can't imagine a man, a good man (because let's face it, it's mostly men that buy women's bodies to use them), going to a prostitute and buying sex like it's ice cream. I don't know why but it rubs me the wrong way and I don't think I'd ever take that man as an ethical person. Who does that? It's so weird!! I always thought of sex work as you know, a profession as old as time, it will always be here and it will always exist, so we may as well legalize it and make it as safe as possible, or decriminalize the workers, or make it illegal to make it go away or... or.. etc. I always thought of it as a debate topic, something weird that people do and get into. But I don't know... people that use this system, I just can't understand them. Is it just ignorance or because sex isn't end all be all for me, who knows. Just a weird thought. People like to bring capitalism into it but sex work predates it. So it's not really related to capitalism, just Man. Oh well.

Ahh exam season has been making me pretty tired and lazy. But I got a new addiction... a certain doll site. I've been having a lot of "fun" on the forums, but I realized the generational divide is pretty big. It seems like teens nowadays are really obsessed with being woke and overly politically correct but at the same time they're quick to judge and cancel you, a very nasty combination. So many of them are toxic too, it's really a sight to behold. I was called racist at least 10 times so far for telling them to report and ignore trolls, probably because they have no idea what trolls are and what their purpose is? It's so funny. They call threads forums and they have no idea what mods are. I don't blame them since this has probably been the first interaction they ever had with a forum but this really makes me feel like a boomer. Weird because I myself am on the cusp of gen Z. I'm impressed at how much time they devote to canceling other minors and kids for saying bad words, even the owner of the site is getting caugt in the crossfire for not "holding people accountable" despite the code of conduct being extremely tight and strict. Anyway that's been my main past time lately. I made my profile look really cute. I've also been working on another webpage that I'll put on here, I'm just not really satisfied with the contents on it. I was thinking of revamping everything and making diary into a separate page looks wise but I'll see. I'm not sure if I want things to be cohesive or all over the place at this point. Probably option 2 because I just want to dick around. Other than that life has been quiet, earthquakes aren't stopping but I got used to them at this point. I mostly caught up with my schoolwork, oh and I got a new phone! I tried messing around a bit with custom widgets, making my own widgets etc. and it's pretty fun although I hate how the widgets lag behind sometimes. Rip my old xperia, you had a good run.